The Evil That Men Do, Calvinball, and What Comes After

It isn’t always men who do evil – a woman is equally capable as any man.

In my last piece, I committed to a second installment on the business of addiction rehab and recovery – it is still coming, but there’s too much work to be done, first. This is much more timely, and there is more to say in this one, than in the other. So, with that…

Look closely at the face of this woman.

If you feel you have the stomach, read more about her, here.

On Tuesday, January 9, courtesy of a phone call from Joey Cataloupe’s mother, we learned that a court in California had awarded her one hundred percent custody, and that he was to be returned to her within ten days. We were devastated, and in a state of shock for most of the remainder of the afternoon until we had to pass the news along to him.

As is typical of a child who has been robbed of his childhood by an alcoholic parent (and all too frequently has had to be the parent), he was stoic as we explained as best we could what had happened despite our promise to him that we would not allow this very thing to occur.

The next day, an official copy of the court’s decree (with several restraining orders against his father) arrived, confirming that of which she had informed us. The decree stipulated that The Kid be returned to the custody of his mother in California no later than Sunday, January 21.

On Thursday, January 18, our time as the guardians of The Kid came to an end. We saw him on to a Southwest Airlines flight to California, where he would be met by his mother, and her aunt.

For the record, given our respective ages, it was unlikely that we would have been Joey Cantaloupe’s unofficial guardians indefinitely. In fact, he was living with us only because his father was at risk of losing custody not to The Kid’s mother but to the Child Services division of the California Department of Social Services’ foster care system.

As long as The Kid was in his father’s custody, however, he was free to see to his son’s welfare to the best of his ability. At The Kid’s grandmother’s urging, he was able to see that sending him to live with us was best for all involved, but especially for Joey Cantaloupe. We were fully expecting that once the school year was finished, and as summer vacation was coming to an end, he would want to return to California to live with his dad.

How It Happened
To the best of our knowledge, shortly after The Kid’s mother learned that he was living with us here in Texas, she (at the direction of her aunt), began the legal proceedings that would result in a hearing to determine who would retain custody of him. The fact that he had been enrolled in school for the remainder of the academic year seemed to only serve as further impetus for her.

On the date of the hearing, The Kid’s father was not in attendance, effectively forfeiting the opportunity to retain and preserve his rights. The reason – not an excuse – he failed to appear is because except for the time he was here visiting (between the day after Christmas and when he returned home after the new year), for most of the latter half of last year, he was drunk. As a result, among the other responsibilities that went neglected was the regular collection of personal mail, and one of the pieces of mail he failed to open in time was the summons to appear in court. His contention that said summons being invalid if not delivered to him via a process server not only notwithstanding, but rendered itself, invalid.

The Kid’s mother – by her own admission – is unfit to be a parent. Her past behaviour (largely driven by a bipolar condition which is untreated as frequently as it is under control) supports this claim. While her actions have never physically harmed The Kid, they have endangered his physical well-being on several occasions.

Shortly after The Kid’s birth, she and his father came to live with his grandmother in Texas. During that time, The Kid’s mother frequently physically assaulted his father, and she often abandoned them both for several days at a time. Finally, she went back to Los Angeles. 

Upon returning to California, his father was able to obtain testimony from her, under oath in court that she was not only not prepared to be a mother but that she had no desire to retain her rights as a parent, and that she wanted nothing more to do with The Kid, his father, and/or the grandmother. 

In the time since, whenever she has attempted to regain her parental rights, The Kid’s father has been in attendance at the hearing to cite precedent already set, thus denying her the custody sought and preserving his. While the court previously did grant her limited visitation rights and subsequently has upheld them absent any reason to deny such, this time, the court determined differently.

For whatever reason, The Kid’s mother’s aunt does not care for his father in the least. Ordinarily, I make it a point not to attribute to malice that which can be attributed to ignorance, but in this instance, that capability escapes me because we have since come to learn:

• It was she orchestrating her niece’s actions that resulted in the hearing.
  There is more than ample evidence (albeit anecdotal) to conclude she did so to spite the father for sending him to live with his grandmother without his mother’s permission – something for which he was under no obligation – legal or otherwise.

• The Kid’s mother is now seeking a modification of the court’s decree because she is unable to meet most of the expenses, which are being defrayed by her aunt – for the moment.

• The Kid was told by his mother that he would be able to return to his former school, that he would be able to see his best friend again, and that he would have most everything that he had left behind, only to find out none of it was true because weeks later, when he was allowed to call and chat with his grandmother and me, he told us he was in a new school, he had not been to his former Boys Club to see his best friend, and he was sleeping on a bed in his mother’s bedroom.

Those two have demonstrated that they view Joey Cantaloupe’s life as little more than a weapon to be used against his father, and that they couldn’t care less about the damage to The Kid, his psyche, and his sense of self-worth.

With the assistance of the California court, the mother’s aunt’s shortsighted and spiteful actions resulted in him being ripped from a loving and compassionate home, a stable environment which included time spent with his cousins on a regular basis, clear boundaries and gentle but firm discipline when warranted, school, new friends in exchange for lies, and a quality of life that is significantly less in every respect.

Learning of this was more sad, disappointing, and demoralizing than it was infuriating.

Compounding the sadness is that his father, despite having been diagnosed with cirrhosis of the liver, has given up even trying to get sober, passively forfeiting not only his rights as The Kid’s father, but that role and place in his life. As a result, the risk that ultimately, Joey Cantaloupe is placed in foster care grows increasingly likely. 

With there being nothing we can do, we are resigned to doing what we can to remain in regular contact, and hope for the best. Our prayer lives have never been more active.

Calvinball
It has been a conscious decision and effort to write about concerns more cultural, on topics that are relevant to many of us despite political orientation or ideology not because the current state of politics it isn’t important, it is – however, my voice, and my views are just one of a cacophony of similar voices, and it is likely that what I have to say about it isn’t so different from what many others already are.

What follows is less about the ninety-one bogus indictments facing the former president, and more regarding what has been revealed as nothing more than a witch, the Attorney General for the State of New York, Letitia James hunting him, his businesses and real estate empire, and seeking to all but personally destroy him and his family.

First, she got her judgement penalty…

Engoron ordered the defendants to pay a total of $464.6 million in fines and interest. Trump’s total was more than $454 million, which includes more than $98 million in prejudgment interest. This interest continues to accrue at a 9% annual rate, adding nearly $112,000 a day to Trump’s bill alone.¹

Never mind that the entire case was a sham, tried in a kangaroo court by a judge drunk on his own power, and that the $454 million penalty was arbitrary, and designed to be an insurmountable obstacle. 

Thankfully, an appellate court reduced the penalty to a more reasonable amount, allowing the former president to arrange the bond pending the entire case being overturned on appeal, if not dismissed entirely.

So, NY AG James still has her judgement in place, just not at the ridiculous dollar amount, and per my understanding of fair play (even if the playing field is not even close to being level), Trump has met every legal requirement thus far, jumped through every one of the court’s hoops, and by any standard, has played by the rules and won this round…oh, wait.

Now, the goal posts are being moved – it’s not enough that he’s posted the bond, and that the guarantor is a publicly traded corporation (which likely couldn’t act in such a capacity without the approval of the board of directors, if not a majority of the shareholders) – no, AG James wants confirmation that the corporation can pay.²

Democrats do this all the time, by the way.

It is, by far, their favourite tactic, especially when it comes to the Supreme Court. Allow me to jog your memory: Brett Kavanaugh – once Mitch “Buffering” McConnell finally got enough of his windsock charges (Jeff Flake – if there was ever a more fitting surname, I’ve yet to encounter it, and Susan Collins) on board to vote to confirm, here comes the now late Sen. Diane Feinstein (D-CA) with decades-old allegations by someone who was not even an acquaintance of the nominee at the time they allegedly occurred, but are so serious that they must be investigated and of course, instead of telling her and the rest of those vipers to pound sand, Sen. Grassley obliges and accommodates their every request, never mind that the allegations were found to be entirely without merit.

Or, let’s revisit Justice Clarence Thomas’ confirmation hearings. Having endured such insulting and racist questioning from bigots like Sen. Paul Simon (D-IL), and Patrick Leahy (D-VT), suddenly here comes Howard Metzenbaum with outrageous allegations from a woman scorned, one Anita Hill, but because they are serious allegations, they must be fully investigated before the vote in the full senate.

You see, to Democrats, rules are not really rules to be followed, by them. For Democrats, legislative business in the House of Representatives, or the Senate, or the Executive and/or Judicial Branches of government is just a never-ending game of Calvinball 

‘Calvinball is a game invented by Calvin [of the Calvin and Hobbes comic] in which one makes the rules up as one goes along. Rules cannot be used twice. No Calvinball game is like another. The game may involve wickets, mallets, volleyballs, and additional equipment as well as masks.’³ 

…except that there is more integrity when played by Calvin, and his plush-toy tiger, Hobbes.

I wonder what the court will next require that has not, nor likely ever will be required of any other defendant whose surname is not Trump.

So, What Comes After?
“After what?” you ask – it’s a good question.

One might assume it implies loss. In regard to The Kid’s forced return to California, it is, in fact. What comes after the actual loss? What comes after that experience? I suppose the answer is grieving, of a sort – coping.

We grieved the loss of Joey Cantaloupe’s daily presence in our lives each in our own way, being certain to reassure each other that we were available to listen at any time if one of us needed to talk. After all, The Kid had only gone away – he hadn’t died. We kept open the lines of communication – we didn’t shut out each other, making the grieving private.

For my part, I was able to immerse myself in work. This is much easier to do when you work to live, instead of the other way around. Far too many of us are unknowingly caught in that trap, and it is dangerous. Over time, it robs us of almost everything that ought to make life worth living.

The question, “What Comes After” can be asked in regard to any number of other topics, though. For example, I find myself wondering what comes after Trump leaves the stage, after he exits the arena.

The day will come when he is no longer a force in politics, the Republican Party, or popular culture, and when that day comes, my view is that it will usher in a display of the Law of Unintended Consequences the likes of which no one has ever seen or could even imagine.

To wit:
The Democrats will be without their #1 bogeyman – not that they won’t select a new one, but he or she will not generate the same kind of personal hatred they have for Trump. The same is true for all the RINOs and other assorted sundry NeverTrumpers.

I, myself, would not rule out an upheaval similar to that which gave birth to the Republican Party of Lincoln, which has largely been subsumed into the Democrat Party.

Trump as a political and cultural force of nature will likely have been long gone, but those that voted for him beginning in 2016, then in 2020, and 2024, will not be returning to the GOP, and a fair number will not be returning to the Democrat Party, either. The vast majority of Trump voters (if I am at all representative) vote for him because his policies are perceived (at least) to be America-first, in nature – in a word, MAGA. 

Whatever it meant when first coined as a campaign slogan, what it means is now is unmistakable, even if the priority of the ideals differs from person to person:

Secure borders.
An America truly with liberty, and justice, for all.
An America with only one protected class: Americans.
An America whose government is free of the administrative regulatory deep state, and whose legislative, and judicial branches have reclaimed their respective responsibilities from the same.
American workers, and American industry, first.
An America that is energy-independent of foreign oil because its own resources make it a net exporter of oil, and natural gas.
An America once again respected by allies both old and new.
An America whose military is once again both respected and feared because its purpose is to defend the nation, not fight other nations’ endless proxy wars, overseas.

MAGA has the potential to be a movement aligned more closely with populist Republicans, traditional Democrats, and genuinely independent voters – not the ones who merely claim to be. Conservatives, as they are known today, are characterized more by what they oppose than by what they support – they are a minority in every sense of the word, politically homeless, and it’s likely they would become the new independent voters. Hence, it would not surprise me to see the modern Republican Party go the way of its predecessor, replaced by the MAGA movement – perhaps even the MAGA Party. 

Meanwhile, the Democrat Party will continue to be home to Marxists and other factions of the ultra-radical left.

Just because he’s gone doesn’t mean what he represented is gone, too. The influence of the Trump Doctrine (MAGA) will have impact on American politics and culture for generations.

…and now
Kids are remarkably resilient.

Despite the circumstances, Joey Cantaloupe seems to be doing well, though we have borne witness to one or two isolated instances of him acting out. Images we’ve received show him to be healthy, genuinely happy, and thriving.

On the few occasions when we’ve been able to talk with him on the phone, there’s nothing in what he tells us, or in the sound of his voice, for us to conclude otherwise.

Yes, he should have been allowed to stay with his grandmother and me until the end of the school year, but it didn’t work out that way. Perhaps he’ll be allowed to visit us sometime this summer.

Thank you, dear reader, for your time and indulgence.

Until next time…

1. https://www.cnbc.com/2024/02/28/trump-lawyers-plan-to-post-100-million-bond-in-ny-fraud-appeal.html

2. https://fortune.com/2024/04/04/ny-trump-lawyers-underwriter-justify-bond/

3. https://www.sessionlab.com/methods/calvinball